sometime i wonder why people that easy be friend with is the one who going to leave.
jing, my bestie had been terminate from that company, its a damn pathetic situation.
my work place getin bored and bored each passing day.. the manager was like be there in the shop everyday=.= i wish i could pick up a gun and shoot the manager.haha.
but its just ridicilous. haha
EC is more better eventhough its kinda bored too.
the art class is damn fun..
i started to draw something with i never did during my secondary school.
haha. i start to colouring and drawing..
i tought that my hand cant do such a things like that.
but yet, hehe its still works.:)
incredible.haha
I felt like – like I don’t know what. Like this wasn’t real.
he went to PERAK already..
I could feel the addiction sucking at me, that i wanted to keep him near me..
but i cant. i miss him alots.
sacrifice is what i need.
hope that hes doing fine there<3>
i havent watch eclipse yet eventhough i was the one who eager to watch it before. sigh-
edward cullen<3.>
lastnight i was sending this - i miss you friend and t'caree- to all my friend..i feel like i miss my old friends and my old school..
sumeof them call me back.. and sumof them just ignoring me..
i know i was like..not really a good friend at all..
but yet.. i stiill i miss them..
i slept at 5am lastnite..again..
sometimes i wonder would it be just imposibble if I could sleep well for just one freaking night?
today my off day.. i was missing my friends there espically mya and jing
i really did like them. they was someone I could easily be friends with.
and currenty... justin bieber- baby
i start to smile to my self when i heard this song..
andd i miss EC friends...
and good bye to priyaa.. hope that shes will sucess at MMU..
goodluck girl:)
and goodbye to someone too. and goodluck too..
and I couldn’t stop the gloom that engulfed me as I realized I didn’t know how long I would have to wait before i can see you again after this..
i wish that u can spend with me more time before u go:(
yes indeed.. i miss you too
I know i was wrong all the time
like i am the magnet for trouble.
im promise going to fixed my self and not going to complain..
but as i say all this i guess i just violated the treaty..
i'd been in pain and that pain suddenly deceased..
Like everything in life, I just had to decide what to do with what I was given.
It’s pleasant knowing that i had been accepted to work again
but i dont expected that it was all their tactic to put a shame on me.
and now im move on again
i preety desperate need money right now.
i need partime work to pay all my :-
school fee transport fee , to buy new books and for my own pocket money for every month..
I tried to think of a logical solution that could explain how am i going to pay all this?
a solution that excluded the assumption that I was insane enough doing partime job while studing.
but i have no choice, i had to survive by myself without depending on my parents.
so today.. im glad coz i had been accepted to be work again..
I admit that I have no experience with working while studing.
But after think about it twice, it just seems logical…
money and knowledge have to be somewhat equal…
as in, one of them can’t always be swooping in and saving the other one.
they have to save each other equally..
thanks god for today..im glad..
If i was being honest, i knew im uneager to get to school again because im lazy to wear school uniform and wakeup early in the morning and the assembely every Monday*sighs
But nevermind, at least its only takes 2years.
i was going without alot of things these day..just watching tv, reading, and sleeping..
but things will never be the same after i start my school on this monday.
i feel like im scarely silly and im guessting it's because i will start a new day there and i dont have any friends that will come along with me.. and im not good in making new friend.
maybe i need to have a Y choromosome so that i can understand people betters and makes a good friends with everyone.
.....
.....
.....
.....
hoping that tommorow going to be a better day, and now we move on to tommorrow.
Of course, I’ll always love you… in a way.
But what happened the other night made me realize that it’s time for a change..
I did know this before- every time I spent a day with u was only going to add to the pain.
What’s the point to all the pain?
If im hurting you so much, how can i be the right thing for you?
what was the point of our twisted love story if its only a sadness and pain?
now i could see every mistake I’d made, every bit of harm I’d done,
the small things and the big things. Each pain I’d caused had ruining your life.
and hurt you so deeply, time and time again.
maybe without me is the best and will make your life better,
You can have your way. My way is always wrong.
You can go on with your life without any more interference from me.
i will not disturb u. i will not brings problem into your life.
absence of me will make your life happier.
because i only bring sadness into your life more than a happiness.
It will be as if I’d never existed.
As i sat here..
i was trying to think of all the times you hurt me and made me cry..
Hoping and wishing that i will stop needing u.. But it didn't..
Because all the times I could remember were the ones when you showed me that you cared..
I didn't want to believe that you ever did u walk by me everyday and say hello..
say goodmorning and goodnight everytime i wakeup and sleep.
Everyday you take time out to listen to me. You talk to me, smile at me, laugh with me, and have fun with me..
Well, I talk, smile and laugh too,
but now,i keep myself silence..
without any news from u.
yet, every breath that i take i wonder where you are and what to do:(
but,its hurt me deeply when u said that im just ruining your life
i bring alots problem into your life and im just burden u.
i have no choice other than keeping my self silence.
because the absence of me will make your life much more better.
i just want u to know,
i have nothing else other that u ,
because u re my life and u re my everything.
syanaloveualotsH:(
im syana.
im not as sweet as an angle and yet, im not as bad as devil.
im juz a girl who make mistakes.
im not happy about the things i have done and the decisions that i had made.
my past is just frustrated pace of life, full of major and minor crises, the down of health, and the failure.
but its lost forever as part of yesterday.
the unkind things i do todae, may never be undone.
and the friendships that i fail to win, may nevermore be won.
I may not have another chance, on bended knee to pray.
i just live my life with hopes, with dream that will never be come true.
